Playing it Safe

My whole life I have tried to play it safe. Don't talk to strangers, don't take risks, try not to stand out. I vowed to not play it safe while i'm in college starting this new chapter. I started off pretty strong made some good friends, even asked this boy who I'd only met a few times to a baseball game and had one of my best nights yet. It's not like these are huge risks but in my mind they are. At this time last year I would have never asked a boy I hardly knew anywhere. There's always that chance of rejection and most of the time just the fear of rejection itself is enough for me to keep my mouth shut and not ask but lately I find myself with some new found confidence. Maybe it has to do with the open door policy my suit has adapted where people and by people I mean the guys just walk in with out knocking and hang out in the room. I like this new attitude. I'm not constantly faced with the anxiety of what will people think because I simply don't care enough. The people here are so open and honest. We talk about anything and everything with no judgment. Everyone is trying to get to know each other and right now clinging onto the people that they connect with. I'm lucky I found "my people", if I didn't I don't think I'd be having as good of a time with out them. I really do think I have met some life long friends.

No this is not about some boy

Contrary to what one might think no this blog isn't about a dumb boy, its about new adventures and experiences. Now I can't promise that at some point there wont be some dumb boy or maybe some stupid crush after all I am an 18 year old girl who just started college but what I can promise that I will be truthful with all my events thoughts and feelings minus leaving out a few names. I grew up in a small town and decided to embark on this new adventure. I have to say I am loving college, no curfew, no parents, I can go and please as I wish and not get in trouble for forgetting to text that instead of coming home after the mall that we went to megan's. I do miss my car though, the freedom of driving and being able to get myself places when ever I so please. I miss my sister Jules too, my best friend and also my pain in the ass little sister. The other night I was actually texting her and really actually missed being able to drive with her in my passenger seat just talking about life and what was happening in hers. I do miss my parents a little bit but then again I wasn't really home that much with them, I was at work and school during the day then on weekends I would go out. I think part of me was actually preparing to leave them this year by keeping myself so busy and becoming less dependent on them. Part of me feels content at school surrounded by my new friends but then the other part if me worries what am I missing. Jules joined the volleyball team and I wasn't home for that. Jules also has her first boyfriend, or rather "not boyfriend" because he hasn't asked yet. The point is I wasn't there to take her out for ice cream when she survived cuts and I won't know if the boy who is clearly head over heels for her asked her out simply because I am not home. I am here. My new home. My new friends.